“Daniel, as part of your role at Gospelife Church, you’ll be meeting with Dave as your life mentor,” the executive pastor said. “Take the initiative to connect with him and aim to meet weekly or bi-weekly.”
I walked out of my meeting feeling a mix of confusion and uncertainty. I had just stepped into my youth ministry internship as a single, inexperienced young man, still unsure of my calling. I knew I had signed up to learn the ropes of youth ministry, but the concept of having a mentor was foreign to me. I had never had one before.
What made it more challenging was that Dave, my assigned mentor, wasn’t just any church member. He was a parent who had expressed concerns during my final interview about my readiness to lead as a youth pastor. And now, I had to meet with him regularly as part of my role.
Our meetings began hesitantly. Twice a month, we’d meet at a coffee shop for about an hour. The first few conversations were awkward as we navigated this new dynamic. But as time went on, the walls came down. I started asking questions, lots of them.
Dave didn’t just answer my questions; he walked with me through my journey. He held me accountable in my walk with God, gave me practical advice on training volunteers, and even helped me navigate my relationship with my girlfriend at the time (now my wife!). Over time, our conversations grew deeper, and our meetings became more frequent.
Eventually, I had the privilege of ministering to all of Dave’s children in the student ministry. His family became some of my biggest supporters, cheering me on through every stage of my journey. Now, years later, as I reflect on my ministry and personal growth, I realize how pivotal Dave’s mentorship was in shaping me. His investment in my life helped me develop spiritually, relationally, and practically as a pastor.
This experience has convinced me of one truth: every young student pastor needs a mentor. Here’s why:
1. Mentors keep you accountable.
Recently, I had the opportunity to have dinner with Shane Pruitt, a nationally recognized leader in next-gen ministry. I asked him for one piece of advice that I should carry as a young pastor. His response was both blunt and profound: “Don’t be stupid.”
As he unpacked it, I understood the weight of his words. Ministry is filled with pressures and temptations, and many young pastors fall early in their careers simply because they lack accountability.
This truth hit home for me, especially when I reflected on my relationship with Dave. He didn’t just check in casually; he was intentional. Dave texted me regularly, asked the hard questions, and wasn’t afraid to lean into uncomfortable conversations. He kept me accountable in my walk with Jesus, my leadership in ministry, and my personal purity.
His consistent presence in my life served as a safeguard. Without someone like Dave to speak into my life, I could have easily made decisions that derailed my ministry. Accountability isn’t just a safeguard; it’s essential for young pastors to thrive and remain faithful to their calling.
2. Mentors provide wisdom.
One of the most challenging aspects of my role was handling conflicts with parents. While navigating disagreements with students felt manageable, parents were far more intimidating.
During those moments, Dave became my go-to resource. Whether it was a quick text or a phone call, he always made time to listen and offer guidance. His perspective as a parent helped me see situations through their eyes, which was invaluable. He equipped me with tools to have difficult but productive conversations, not just with parents but also with church members.
Over time, his mentorship sharpened my perspective, strengthened my conflict-resolution skills, and helped me lead with greater humility and grace.
3. Mentors will support you.
Dave became one of my biggest supporters. Years after our first awkward meeting, Dave prayed at my wedding, my student pastor installation, and sat on my ordination council to approve my ordination. I had the honor of baptizing his son Jacob and praying at his elder installation. We became not just mentor and mentee, but genuine supporters of each other’s journey.
A godly mentor in a young pastor’s life is a win that will make all the difference. A mentor who believes in us, challenges us, and cheers us on through every stage of ministry is invaluable.
– Daniel Kim is student ministry pastor for Gospelife Church in Wheaton.